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LORDFLUFFY

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A relative absolutist, principled miscreant, fervent moderate and opinionated idealist.
Articles Posted: 83  Links Seeded: 216
Member Since: 9/2008  Last Seen: 5/16/2012

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Men and Sex Toys: A Commentary

Wed Feb 24, 2010 12:16 PM EST
odd-news, sex, real, porn, adult, aid, toy, shame, doll, vibrator, wierd, marital, roxxxy
By LordFluffy
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In January of 2010, a sex toy called Roxxxy was debuted at the Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas. The device, a life size doll capable of limited movements, voice activated responses and even simulated orgasms, caused a bit of a stir and some amount of conversation. The idea of a "sexbot" has been around almost as long as the concept of the robot. Being on the verge of a functional one of course brings some issues to the public eye.

While I have little experiences with robots, psychology or sociology, I can pull on my experiences as an adult video store clerk to discuss some of those issues. Specifically, men are weird about sex toys.

I don't just mean their own, mind you. I think that men have issues with all manner of silicone and battery operated devices. After all, we're born with perfectly functional sex toys attached, both for our own pleasure and that of our partners. Shouldn't that be enough?

The truth is, though, the spirit is willing sometimes when the flesh is weak or at least in need of a nap. And in those cases, I think it's appropriate and even considerate if a gentleman has his own small box of humming assistants. Assuming his partner is fond of them, of course, there is a great deal that can be accomplished with such devices.

But then, what about those being used on men or for their own solo adventures?

One off putting thing about sex toys designed for men is that they are visually disturbing. Those designed for women are crafted with an almost artistic flair, such that if their purpose weren't obvious, they'd look appropriate as art pieces on the mantle. Alternatively, many are molded after adorable animals; porpoises and penguins, moles and butterflies along side the ubiquitous symbol of sex, the rabbit. Even those molded after the male anatomy are done with taste, and as the penis has its own autonomy even when men discuss it, seeing one without a torso attached seems almost natural.

Men's selection, by contrast, looks like the extras from the prop department working on the next "Reanimator" sequel. Disembodied vaginas and breasts dominate the market, every attempt at realism a new horror. Sometimes these bits are juxtaposed in some improbable fashion, meant to gather together all of the usual points of focus to multiply their effect, but instead simply making them look like a anatomical train wreck.

There are some exceptions, but most of them lie in the high dollar range. A RealDoll will run you over five grand, but with a pair of sunglasses on it, its easy to mistake for a real flesh and blood person at a glance. Spend twenty bucks and you can get a blow up doll slightly more sexy than spare tire.

The market seems to rely on the idea that men in a lust fueled rut will be willing to sacrifice aesthetics for the sake of convenience and sensation, and to some extent that's a safe bet. But still, the actual acquisition of such aids is the subject of shame for many men and finding something that will help grant release but not shred one's dignity or empty one's bank account is not only a challenge, but one that requires that involves steeling one's nerves even before the first package is opened or drop of lube is dispensed.

However, there appears to be a market if not a need for such things. Roxxxy had over 4000 preorders in the month after its/her debut. The RealDoll turned from a curiosity to a business for it's creator in short order. Estimates for the value of sex toy industry vary, but the consensus is that it's a multi-billion dollar business.

Someone is obviously buying.

While I understand that some people avoid sex toys altogether due to moral objections or the belief that a piece of silicone used to pleasure one's self or partner somehow leads to wild promiscuity, I have to implore my brothers to not fear them. While the real thing is best, on many levels, there is no real shame in using toys when taking matters into one's own hands. There is joy to be had for one's self and solid evidence that, if approached with the consideration, attentiveness and communication required for all sexual endeavors, sex toys really can help enhance one's encounters (no one has ever suggested Viagra for your shoulders).

And maybe if we talk about it openly, we can encourage suppliers to provide toys that don't look like an autopsy. Just sayin'.

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  • Public Discussion (10)
LordFluffy

Note, in the article I specifically didn't address the creepyness factor of those who start to forget that their sex dolls are in fact dolls. I also didn't go over proper sanitation and care of one's sex toys, as that seemed beyond the scope of the article.

All comments welcome, within the CoH.

  • 1 vote
Reply#1 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 12:19 PM EST
K-joy

Good topic, that I will be checking in on...I am curious as to what a fella would like from his toys. You are so right about the things available to folks looking to simulate sex with a woman, they are odd plastic things. If you want the real feel, there are stray hairs glued to it. It leaves alot to be desired.

  • 2 votes
Reply#2 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 12:46 PM EST
Cactus

I really enjoy my sex toys! AS a male I don't have life size dolls, but many actual size viginas and penis that I can interact with me or each toy. I'm very over sexed, and these toys keep me satisfied where its hard to find the right partner to enjoy the real thing. Believe it or not I don't consider myself a pervert, because I never do any of the things or discuss outside of my secret room. In my life I was fortunate to share my rituals with 2 women (not at the same time) who I felt very comfortable to tell my secret to. They totally loved watching and particpating. I even have a mix of vasiline, white lotion, and clear sex lube that I warm up in a microwave, that when put on these toys, well lets say use YOUR imagination. They clean up with warm water nicely. I would love to hear from anyone else this far into these toys and compare.

  • 2 votes
#2.1 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 2:59 PM EST
LordFluffy

I am curious as to what a fella would like from his toys.

Same as women I imagine: durability, ease of use, pleasurable sensation.

Aesthetically, I think that having sex toys that are either life size and lifelike or smaller and less so is better than small and lifelike. Men get turned on visually, sure, but usually that stimulation comes from porn and the toys just help bring things to a conclusion.

But then again, as it takes all kinds, I'm sure my perspective on this is far from exhaustive.

  • 1 vote
#2.2 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 3:32 PM EST
K-joy

Since you brought it up Cactus...you like to play with your toys in front of the woman in your life? If I am reading your comment correctly you like to create the experience using laytex and lotion. I am not being critical, I am just curious if that is your secret, is that what you enjoy as foreplay? I hope you don't mind me asking but what is it about the toys that you enjoy so much?

  • 1 vote
#2.3 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 3:43 PM EST
Cactus

K-joy, I don't do that as foreplay, only as i state the few times I had a sixth sense about the person to ask them to see and enjoy my world. I do enjoy normal sex when I can have the oppertunity,but these toys fill the void 3-4 times a week of my sex drive. The special mix lotion adds the sense of feel (because I warm it) sense of sight( because I can have it dripping or streaming from the vigina or penis on my lips, body and anywhere it LANDS.)

  • 1 vote
#2.4 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 4:37 PM EST
K-joy

I am glad you enjoy your world, Cactus. I should say, that now knowing your kink is insertions and pseudo ejaculations, your handle frightens me...prickly and all. Perhaps you need a smoother name? lol

I think that you should save some coins and look into getting your very own Roxxy. I bet you would have loads of fun with a gal like that ;)

  • 1 vote
#2.5 - Thu Feb 25, 2010 9:26 AM EST
Reply
MTLGuy

A vibrator is pretty easy to stash versus a silicone woman so I think that helps sales. Also I think alot of sex toys are purchased by men in the hopes of seeing a woman use it on herself, I dont think woman have that same interest. Any women here ever buy a plastic vagina in hopes of watching your man hump it?

  • 2 votes
Reply#3 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 2:17 PM EST
LordFluffy

A vibrator is pretty easy to stash versus a silicone woman so I think that helps sales.

True, though the various sleeves and other male sex toys aren't really hard to store.

Also I think alot of sex toys are purchased by men in the hopes of seeing a woman use it on herself, I dont think woman have that same interest.

You'd be surprised.

  • 1 vote
#3.1 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 2:55 PM EST
MTLGuy

Suprised, shocked and a little wierded out ;-)

  • 1 vote
#3.2 - Wed Feb 24, 2010 3:27 PM EST
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